'Fattynating' Conspiracy

Posted by snowleopard on June 24, 2010 · 6 Comments 

I believe that there is a conspiracy to keep me from achieving my idle weight. A year ago I was a complete exercise buff who used to

It remains unused and neglected

hit the gym regularly at 0500 hr for 2 hr before going to college, till I was plagued by accidents (A broken arm from a motorcycle fall to name a few) and ill-health. Since then I have started eating food that was earlier out-of-bounds and each day I make a pledge to start my exercises. I even went on to make a gym in the backyard of my house but the only visitors there are pigeons, who have left white spots all over. And not to mention there is a thick layer of dust on all the equipments now.

But more important is the fact that my diet went out of control. Each day I had a new craving. Cakes were a must and fizzy drinks that come in all types of different colours form a vital part of my balanced diet. It became so bad that I was unable to fit in my old jeans and had to by a bigger size. This made me feel terrible and I made a vow to scrape out the layer of fat that had adhered itself over my abdominal muscles. I walked a lot and shed a few kilo. I regained some confidence and decided to do some heavy exercises. 5 minutes later I was back on bed as I had ripped a tendon.

Why do they taste so good?

But this time I knew what I should not be doing. I was determined to keep my diet in check. I went for small walks daily and everything was going on fine. While coming back I happened to pass through a KFC. The sweet smell of fresh chicken filled my nose and my feet turned towards the gate as if by reflex. I took a deep breath and scolded myself. Gluttony is a sin and I was not going to succumb to it.

I decided to meditate for 5 minutes and destroy the feeling of anticipation that was developing in my stomach. 5 minutes later I found myself over the counter:

“What would you like, sir?” the lady asked with a big smile.

“Give a Zinger meal without cheese, fries…..make them large, medium Pepsi.”

“Sir, if you add Rs. 5 medium Pepsi will be converted to large. Also do try our Krusher and the new chocolate cake,” she smiled again

I didn’t have the heart to say no to her.

5 minutes later I was sitting on a table with a Zinger meal without cheese (Large Pepsi and fries and an additional piece of fried bird), a chocolate cake and a Whipped Cookie Krusher. Damn, why do these things taste so good? I knew I was going to hate myself after this but what the heck.

Yes, there must be a conspiracy to keep me from achieving my desired targets. I have many theories in mind but until I can single out the most valid one, I will stick with Alien’s brainwashing me.

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Filed under Humour, Random Ramblings · Tagged with fat, fries, junk food, KFC, Krusher, Zinger